May 31...

That is the day I have my "life" back. Don't get me wrong, I like what I'm currently doing and couldn't really ask for a better gig (well, I could, but I don't think anyone would listen). It's just my life exists in a parallel universe to all you other young, working professionals. I live in a vacuum where personal, sick, and vacation days really don't exist. My weekends involve bus travel, like many of yours do, but my travels take me to various 200 and 400 meter tracks in the northeast, not to exciting nightlife destinations. I don't think many of you would classify my weekends as "great." I do most times, so I guess I'm different. I'll have had one off weekend from mid January until the end of May, and let me tell you something: my ass will not be traveling to NYC or Boston or anywhere other than off the couch on the weekend of March 20-21. Sorry to disappoint you if you had your hopes up.

"so and so came this weekend, why didn't you?"
"It's XYZ's birthday party this weekend, you coming down?"
"Why do I never see you out on the weekends?"
"Why have you never made it down?"

My apologies to all. I love each and every one of you and I get a little misty each weekend when I hear of all the debauchery you donkeys are involving yourselves in.

Don't worry, though. Post-May 31 by now you're all aware of my lack of employment which means I will be coming to a couch near you for an indeterminate (read: until you kick me out...aggressively) amount of time.

Yes, all (six...) of you. Get ready, I'll be making up for lost time. Cheers (and, soon enough, kisses).