My Yellow NotePad: Winter doldrums..

Aloha. It's been quite some time. I don't even know how long. I know I've written once this month. I included quite a few words but I don't think I really said very much. That's kind of how I've been feeling lately. I've got quite a bit running running running through my head but there seems to be some broken connections between my brain and my fingers/mouth/whatever because I yet to be able to express how, exactly, I feel. Discombobulated. So, instead of writing I haven't been doing very much. I read Fight Club last week. Excellent read. I don't think that helped to clear my head as the entire storyline is about a pretty mixed up guy. I haven't had insomnia recently so I don't think I have to worry about developing a split personality just yet, which is a good thing. I recommend reading it if you're looking for a new read. It's much better than the movie, though I did enjoy the movie, too. Had I been better informed and more into reading ten years ago I would have liked to have read the book first, but that's neither here nor there now as the past cannot be changed. Down the road I'm sure I'll read more books by the author, Chuck Palahniuk, though right now I have many books in my possession I haven't yet read so I'd rather tackle those than buy more books. Eventually I'd like to read enough books I already have so I can send some back to my folks' place, but I've been saying that since I got here and it hasn't happened yet. I've traded some books when I've been back but I know there's absolutely no way all of the books I have now will fit into the bags I'll be carrying whenever I depart from here. But I'm confident things will shake out just fine whenever things actually have to shake out.

I think the new year has a way of messing with me in such a way that I get thrown into a bit of a funk. I've never really considered this before. When I was coaching the new year was daunting because it meant many, many consecutive six day work weeks as the new year brought the start of indoor meets which rolled immediately into outdoor meets. Last year I was fairly miserable around the new year because I didn't really have much of a plan for what was “next” in my life. I was living at home. It was cold and snowy. I wasn't working as the roofing season had come to a conclusion shortly after snowfall in the middle of December. Let's just say I had plenty of time to be miserable and not leave the house. I'm fairly certain this year's new year funk was a carry-over from not being home for the holidays, coupled with a little bit of an itch for a change. I'm quite happy here, but at the same time I'm getting that restless feeling and this time I'm feeling a desire to find a career path that could be for the long term. I have no idea what this could be, exactly, though I do have some potential avenues I've already discussed and others I plan to explore sometime in the not so distant future. This is by no means a rush to change, but I do feel a need to take a small step forward in the stages of change I learned so much about in my undergrad psychology classes.

This concerns the few of you still reading because I'd appreciate any input you may have for me. What, if anything, should I do next? Am I a fool for considering departing this beautiful island after barely a year? Do you know of a job that may interest me that you could help me obtain (Heh, heh..)? I'm all ears. This could be a very fleeting thought and by the end of this week I could be very well calling myself a fool for thinking this way, but at the same time I'm finding motivation right now so it certainly can't hurt to look around a bit. And, hell, I could have purchased one hundred and seventy thousand junior bacon cheeseburgers for the price of my undergraduate degree, so the least they can do is help me out in my job search, right?