Tuesday, December 30, 2008

"Knee Jerk" Good Read

As a year closes it causes many folks to reflect on the year gone by, the good things and the bad, and their expectations for the upcoming year. I am not one of these people. But that's not really the point. What the last couple days of the year has brought is the end of one of the best written weekly pieces on the internet during the Professional fooseball season, and that my friends is the "Knee Jerk Reactions" to Patriots games by Barstool Sports contributing writer Jerry Thorton.

Two to get you smiling:
*It's purely an act of faith on my part, but I like to think someone on the Pats roster spent the day quoting "Twister" because that's what I would've done. "And Matt Cassel walks up to the wind and says 'Have a drink' and he chucks the ball into the wind and it never hits the ground, man. That's why we call him The Extreme."

*At the very least someone should've been calling Ralph Wilson Stadium "The Suck Zone."

Seriously. This guy pulls together a gem every week. I just had to touch base on my undying support of Jerry Thorton because of the numerous Twister references he made during his chronicle of the blustery Pats finale in the Greater Buffalo area. Any one can toss around three of four Twister references and work them into a story about an obsencely windy day, but when all of your references are tweaked quotes from Philip Seymour Hoffman in an incredibly underrated role from the earlier portion of his career it's truly something remarkable. Seymour Hoffman played Dustin "Dusty" Davis, who himself appeared a little bit twisted throught the movie (As I reflect right now I don't think anything could have been more appropriate than this Dusty character being the first commercial endorser of Twisted Tea...Dusty hands bottles to throngs of young adult men at an outdoor party, clouds come over and after sips everyone of them starts spinning and flies off into the sky, the camera comes back to Dusty saying like "It's the suck zone...it's the point where the twister, basically, sucks you up..." Though having to include Bill Paxton's confused and constipated face at the end with a, "That's why they call him the Extreme" reference would have doomed that campaign...but, it's still fun to dream...) and some of his lines are gems. Even playing an asshat this guy could always bring it. But I digress, back to Jerry.

Basically, I got caught up in the 'Stool a couple of years ago and it was new and fresh and catchy. A rather amusing self-centered host and his merry men (UB, Manzo, JT) to cover the bases of everything that is and is not Boston-based sports and random pop-culture. But now it's basically just Pres being a clown and JT bringing it once a week with heavy hitting Pats coverage. Good random movie references, and also an above average knowledge of the game. Not a football-Enstein-genius like myself, but still far batter than almost anyone on bigtime TV today outside of Tom Jackson and Trent Dilfer. And I'm serious about Dilfer, that guy knows the pro game.

So, Mondays are manageable...everything else is getting pretty weak. So, I just want to apologize for not bringing up my appreciation for these earlier in the year. I like the Giants, you all know that, but Marie watches the Pats every weekend so I have a frame of reference for his genius. Check the back issues and then tune in next year...but not until then. Unless you watch The Hills...


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